27 July 2009

Evolution of M

The bloody 'mou han' ended up in a bloody 'M' . Some finger-pointing, shouting, screaming, hair-tearing & a shed of tear knocked some sense into me to settle for just a 'M' .

Few days later I begin to realize. M is good. M won't invoke questions that will leave me go errr....ummm... M is universal. M is simple but catchy. M won't deter that cute photographer from asking me out for dinners >:)

Michelle is already planning an inscription:
Smile, though your heart is aching
Smile, eventhough its breaking
When there are clouds in the sky,
You'll get by ...
on the back of her neck

04 July 2009

Played Out

i am always played. people out there just want to hurt my feelings. why? is this some bad karma from my past life? or those suckers out there just get a freggin kick seeing me hurt with tears rolling down? when i'm hurt, memories of 8th May start flooding back. i sit at the corner of my bed reminiscing that phone call he made. he told me, "i feel i can live alone now. i don't need anyone..."
i said goodbye and ended the call. i sat there with my head slumped to the wall, tears rolling down non-stop for many months. Various images flashed through my head; i felt like running away, i felt like slitting my wrist, i felt like drinking detergent, i felt like calling him back, i felt like going back in time wishing that call was never made. i remembered at that same moment, one of my primary mates called. bad timing. i wailed, yelled and scared the shit out of him. he could only console me by saying, "there're plenty of bastards out there. this bastard is not worthy"

why are there so many bastards in my life? jeez!
stupid Muthar Farker just have to shout, twist and twirl the story to make me look i am in the wrong. WTF?

and still i allow myself to be fooled by sweet charming words. i swallow my pride. i cry, wail for 10 mins. i wipe my tears, pretend nothing happen. i put on my cheerful smile and hope yet again a fairytale life awaits me.

isn't that what all girls dream of?

Michelle hates that bastard and loves that bastard at the same time

Thanks for ruining dinner, you arsehole !

Why do you have to raise your voice at me? You think u're so high up and mighty? Dad has stopped doing that since I was 12. What gives you the fucking right to do so? Would you even dare to raise your voice at Gerri?! I bet my head you wont! And the each time you deny, "I where got raise my voice at you? why are you so sensitive? i am 200% sure i DID NOT raise my voice"

ok fine fine. i have super hearing then! everything you say is amplified by 1000 decibels!

What did I do to deserve this? Fuck you .

Michelle is pointing her middle finger !

02 July 2009

Good evening Sir, you wanto buy?

I had an interesting conversation over lunch today. About how guys are suckers for tall, skinny, fair-skinned, long hair girls. Working in an industry that employs hundreds of girls to promote our sales, boys in the promotions-department are having a ball! One of them even gloat, oh i fark her, and her, and that one, and this one. oooh... the last one's wild. then there's left that one, and that one, and that one, and the entire saturday shift.

Eww. Have you spoken to any of the girls lately?

So how long have you been in this line?
Umm... i works for 3 months already. Meets many of customers. hehe. I sell very good.
Okay. why do you think you deserve this job?
Umm... i don't know. heheh. i can talk bahasa. my bahasa not bad.

Doesn't that just turn you off already? But no. Constructing proper sentences isn't in the list-of-must-haves. Boys' (no surprise) list-of-must-haves only contain:
  1. long legs
  2. hole
  3. *fake eyelashes optional

Michelle says, be it any hole, men is a happy man.

01 July 2009

Urgent Disclaimer

i found out something surprising. someone reads this shit as well. for i thought it was just me and occasionally Aud, after she could no longer stand my annoying reminders: 'Go Read my Post!'
Now that i found you out, Yes YOU, theres a certain disclaimer i want you to be aware of.

*the posts here are by no means any indications, reflections, projections of who i am in flesh. as a matter of fact, i'm quite the opposite. this is my alter-ego. i pretend to be someone not me, someone not bounded by traditional values, someone not restricted by society's perception, someone who give no farks about what my cousin's brother's auntie's sister-in-law's auntie think of my body art. i derive pleasure from escaping conformity.

in flesh, i am sweet and politely-mannered like how all mommies want their daughters to be.

Michelle is in the opinion that the uninformed should not read further. it will give you nightmares...