2009, the year that was. A mixture of emotions - laughter, joy, anger, hatred, sadness, betrayal and depression.
The year started out good, she had a chance in a lifetime to go see real snow!12hrs on board KLM and 2hrs on board TGV was worth every second. Walking down the cold, wet streets of Lausanne in search of lunch, brought her realism that the world is huge. The world does not revolve around Zouk & 1 Utama only. Watching blonde hair girls in fancy winter jackets and aged men sipping coffee in a thermostat warm cafes, showed her what a beautiful world God has created.
She also accomplished her childhood dream of becoming a diver! What better way than to get certified in Mabul, one of Malaysia's most beautiful islands. Coincidentally, her course coincided with Valentine's day; a V-day she will remember for the rest of her life. Twinkling stars, cool sea breeze, rhythmic waves... what more a girl could ask for. She was indeed happy. A pure, sincerest form of joy.
A few overseas trip followed, though it didn't matter where... it was more about who. Many happy days were shared, times when she WAS his princess. Falling in love is such a strange phenomena; you act giddy & foolish, sometimes irrational not giving a shit on what's happening and all you want, is just be together. On Sunday mornings, he will snug up and say, "Beee, wake up... what do you feel like eating today?" "Pork noodles!", she'll yelled
Did anyone tell you all form of joy is temporary? No one told her, she learned it the hard way. Most painfully was the day at the airport, when she watched him turned his back and walked away from her. She knew at the back of her mind, she has lost him. He won't be coming back.
Alas, she survived the teary journey cab back home. Many more heart wrenching days followed, though she is still getting through the i-miss-him-so-much moments, time will help. It's coming in to the 4th month now, does anyone think she's getting better? chee tat?
2010 is just a running number. Nothing's special. But it is a time to forget the shit from the past and appreciate the future. She should forget the divemaster - the man whom she thought she can't live without - and move on. Mend her broken heart and move on.
Michelle wishes Happy New Year and hope 2010 will be a better year for her, her loved ones, her caring friends and for her Divemaster. Let's hope things won't work out with that bitch and he'll regret so badly he left Michelle